Distracted Defeat

A cough tickles in her throat as she sips her warm coffee in a desperate attempt to make the nagging cough disappear. Lighting a cigarette in hopes that it will miraculously cure her of this ailment too, as it lies to her about curing all the others. Gagging, it is quickly stubbed out. Desperate for nicotine, but unable to fill her desire for it, she turns her attention to the page set before her.

The deadline for Audrina Westgate’s book was approaching fast. She hadn’t even started. Unable to type but a word on the screen as the days passed more and more furiously as those before them.

She picked up the stubbed out cigarette once again. Cleared her throat, and lit it with determination to get her fix this time. Burning it’s way down her throat she felt the deep inhale of the cigarette smoke fill her lungs as the room around her filled with the stale stench of it. She lightly cleared her throat and inhaled again, happy to have more than one hit.

Life had taken a drastic turn since she signed the publishing contract. Her previous novels had flowed through her fingers like water through a faucet, painting the page with perfect stories of lust and heartbreak. Gripping her readers to the pages like glue.

This time though was far different for Audrina. Not a word went through her mind as she desperately sought an idea for the book she was supposed to hand in to the publisher soon. Each day was merely another heap of crinkled up paper littering the waste basket, and much to Audrina’s dismay, a large area surrounding the basket as well.

With a large sigh she got up and went to the kitchen to warm herself another cup of coffee and take her morning pills. Seven of them now. She counted each one as it slipped down her throat and into her stomach. One for depression, one for pain, two for anxiety, two for high blood pressure. She wondered as she drank down the rest of the cold glass of milk how, in a matter of only a few month, she had went from being so young and healthy to an aged person whom needed a mountain of medication to survive each day.

Right on cue her five year old daughter started whining at her hip before she had the last pill down.

“I’m cold Mommy. I want dressed NOOOWWWWW Mommmmmyyyyy,” the young girl whimpered.

Audrina rushed to dress the child. Next came her step daughters three year old daughter, leaving a trail of little wet footprints across the hard wood floor. Without a moment of rest along came her stepdaughters two year old son toddling behind the girls. The floor now a chorus of tiny footprints to mop up.

After dressing the children. Going through nearly every movie in the house until they were settled down to a new cartoon. Waving good-bye to her eleven year old son as he hopped in his friends parents car for whatever adventures they had in mind for the day. Finishing her medication. Warming her coffee again. Audrina finally sat back down to her desk to begin her story once again.

“Mommy can you open this?” whined the five year old again.

“I want one.” cried the three year old.

“MEEEE,” shrieked the two year old.

Defeated, Audrina shut her laptop with a loud thud. Opening the snack sized package of Whoppers, she handed each child one. Took a long drink of her coffee. Leaving her desk once again for the trials of another day in the Westgate home.



Categories: 2016

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